20 Things that make a MICAn

For anybody who has been to MICA, it is hard not to have an opinion on its students.
This post is for them and others who don't know what the primary inhabitants of MICA are like. Aspirants, recruiters, fellow B-schoolers, faculty and industry professionals - this post is your window towards knowing the species known as MICAns better. So here are 20 essential things you should know about MICAns.

1. He pfaffs. Period.

2. His number-crunching ability is matched only by the elephant's ability to stand on its trunk and do a triple-somersault.

3. His finance fundamentals are far more f***ed than any prostitute in Kamatipura or Sonagachi.

4. His Kotler textbook has only one P of marketing - Promotion.

5. His laptop is his only true friend.

6. He attends lectures when he's not in the mood to sleep.

7. He loathes his faculty and walks out of class when the old guy gets unbearable.

8. He is either bald or has longer tresses than his girlfriend.

9. He pisses off visiting faculties not only by his intellectual impotence but also by being indifferent to it.

10. He parties hard - so hard that he doen't get a hard on at the end of it.

11. He snacks at a place which is worse than a roadside kiosk run by a slimy Bania in Bundelkhand.

12. He blogs, orkuts and messages more frequently than he pees.

13. Half of him chases grades with a vengeance that puts Shoaib Akhtar's quest for pace to shame.

14. The other half of him just couldn't care less about grades.

15. He is latched on to the cell-phone in the evenings, even if the network has come apart.

16. He has the best curves in his armoury - whether its gals or Table Tennis skills.

17. He knows the name of more Chhagdawalas (six-seater autowalas) than his faculty.

18. He has seen more movies than the cover pages of his textbooks.

19. He goes to the air-conditioned library to sleep during the summers.

20. He has activity groups that resemble a kindergarten class.

Of course, this is a sarcastic take on how things are here. For all its faults, I wouldn't want to be anywhere else but MICA.